Sunday, December 23, 2007

Stupid Customer Tricks, Holiday Edition

Poeple aren't just busier at Christmas they are dumber. I work retail - I know this. It gets proven every damn year. I had a ...particulairly bad day earlier in the month. Every single thing that could happen happened. Halfway through the day I was certifiably insane I sware if I had killed someone I'ed have totally gotten off. No group of 12 people could look at the rampant idiocy I had to put up with and say, "Oh she knew what she was doing when she put the hanger through that guy's throat." I actually feel rather cheated that i didn't do something like go and get smashed on tequila on my lunch break. I had the perfect excuse and honestly, if it happens again I will so be on the bell tower with a rifle. (Although I think the tallest building in the town is 5 stories and that is the hospital, did you know there is not one escalator in the whole of my city?!? It's so wierd when I get to the big city I go to use one and I realize I have forgotten howto use one ... I just keep kinda missing that key stepping on point ... so embarassing I keep wanting to apologize tot he people behind me and tell them "I used to live where there were REAL shopping malls, honest") Anyways back to the day from hell.

It actually started the night before. I had a woman come into my store to get a refund. No big deal, she bought the pants a week ago, never wore them, has the reciept. She, however, is carrying a bag from another store this is unusual but doesn't mean anything, hell, people have grabbed the first bag they saw and brought in returns in KFC bags (thankfully ungreasy ones) But I check and I see bugundy. We don't have anything in the store that is burgundy. I check the tag. Yup it's from another store. Happens all the time. I say "I'm sorry ma'am, this is from another store. It's just stores to your right towards Sears." Now I am aware it isn't my fault but really people like it when you say your sorry. (And I mean it too, unless they get snarky and ask me if I mean it because then I won't anymore, it's a catch-22). She insists saying she has a reciept. She pulls it out it has the other sore's name on it. The pants are labeled with the other name, the bag has the other store's name, the reciept is from another store- Ladies and gentlemen, we have a trifecta! So I am still calm. I am not laughing at her, I am not upest. I haul out another pair of pants and show her the label, show her the bag and our reciepts, none of them match hers. She gets pretty damn annoyed inisting she bought them in my store and I'm just being difficult...Now at this juncture I'ed like to point out this wasn't someone who was elderly, possibly confused. This woman works in an office for the provincial government. I do believe she is in fact literate. For her sake I was hoping she was simply really, really, drunk (this was actually before the postal incident). I point out that we only sell items with other brands possibly once a year in January, every piece of clothing we sell has our own brand labelled on it. I offer to close my store and walk her the 2 doors down to the other store. She starts to think that perhaps she isn't in the right store after all but it's still not her fault, so decideds to shift her position. "You are owned by the same company!" I mull this over. We have paint on the walls in vaugely the same colour this is the only thing we really have in common. I point out that we are the only retail outlet owned by our parent company which deals in morgages and real estate and that if she was looking to sell her house I could possibly hook her up. I was a bit sarcastic there. She points out that there are similarities on the reciept. Like, you know, the ADDRESS. *sigh* I point out that we also have a grocery store in the mall and she couldn't return , say a spoilt ham, to our store either. She snapped. "Now you are just being silly. I want to see the manager you aren't being helpful at all." I point out that I am a manager (assistant but a manager none the less) and the only one there. Apparently I am lying about this as well. "Well there has to be someone in here to talk to!" I said the only thing that came to mind, "Two doors to your left next to Sears." She storms off. I just about die laughing. So many people think that if you work retail it's because your not smart enough to "get a real job" people with "real jobs" couldn't do my job. Next day (the day from hell) starts with this customer calling me up to bitch about me, to apparently, me. Okaaayy. She felt obligated to tell me that the reciept she had had the wrong phone number on it (it was for the sotre that issued the reciept shockingly enough) and she had to look up our store phone number in the phone book, so apparently she CAN read. She just wanted to tell me that she had written a letter to head office on our company website and she hopes I get fired. I quite reasonably ask which stores website? and she hung up on me. (I checked with the other store to give them the heads up, if they had a complaint registered against them they should know the details because it wasn't thier fault, apparently this story circulated about the other companies' Head Office and she did write a complaint about me to them and they laughed so hard tho not to the woman's face) So yeah I am calling our boss and the other stores' boss to tell them what is going on.

And then, I had a lady come in, and she is really sweet and nice but she does have a bit of dementia and can be hard to predict, comes in ooohs and awes over the new pants saying she needs new pants but she can't try them on because she has a cold... Now if it was a turtleneck (don't think about that one too hard if you have a weak stomach) I'ed understand but pants? She left presubably blowing her nose on her stretch flare jeans...

AND then, I have a guy walk in. I love guys. The come in and they are either so cute and clueless or to the point. I want this and this. Both of which I just love. This guy comes in and says (and this is exactly what he says) "I want to get something for my wife. She shops here all the time. Pick something out for about $200 and I'll be back in about an hour" And that is all he says. I have no idea who his wife is, what size she is, I got nothin. So I go back to trying to get ahold of people in charge of websites and folding sweaters.

AND THEN, (trust me when I tell people about my day they just gasp everytime I say and then, there were a lot of and then's that day) I have another customer come in, who is a little off. She wants the pants in the window. I show it to her and she gets really mad. And I don't know why. "I can't wear pants with zippers!" Cuz apparently I was supposed to know this. Thinking rather fast (and at this point I was more than slightly impressed with myself for being able to think at all) I say if she is allergic to metal we have plastic coated zippers on another style (yeah I know, impressive, huh?) That's when she drops this little bombshell on me. "Women aren't supposed to wear zippers on the FRONT of thier pants. I don't just like it says in the Bible." Bwah? Now I skipped the last few... decades... of church but I think I'ed remember that little rule and if somehow someone discovered a mistranslation and Moses came down with a tablet that said " In 1914 when the zipper is invented (I looked it up) thou women shalt not wear them in the front of thier pants", instead of say that adultary one, I'ed like to think that that would make the news. CNN, the Times, something. As we have no side zips in the store I rather meliciously send her to another store who has a clerk who annoys me.

AND THEN, the guy "shopping" for his wife comes back. And asks me what the hell I've been doing for the last hour as I haven't picked anything out. I point out that I don't know who his wife IS. He says, quite irritably, that his wife shps in the store all the time and I should know her. I ask if he comes in with her. He acts like it was the dumbest question he had ever heard and/or I have just insulted his masculinity and says no. So I stare at him (which I think you will agree was the safest course of action) and he twigs (hala-freaking-lluja). "You don't know who she isss...." I shake my head. "Oh well I got her a watch already anyways, nevermind."

We opened at 10 and all this happened by 12:30 when an associate was scheduled. I apparently looked slightly scary. This is a younger girl with a great attitude, not much phases her but yeah she was all about backing away slowly fron the crazy person.

I went on lunch. AND THEN, (I feel like I am stuck in that Dude, Where's My Car? movie) someone came in trying to return a 3 year old coat that didn't fit his girlfriend, that was from another manufactuor/retail chain. (He came back in last week apparently he forgot what he had bought her and she asked him to return the brown coat back and just brought us the first one he saw, judging by the smell of weed on him this wasn't a shock) I wasn't there but was told when I'ed be back. He didn't come back that day.

And then, I finally get ahold of the boss and tell her about my day and the complaint VIA website, which may or may not come to us. She damn near dies laughing and asks if it's a full moon. Nope but after reviewing my day I hvae come to the conclusion. I know exactly what happened. It wasn't a full moon. My city was hosting the annual full frontal lobodomy survivor reunion.

I can always count on ,my friends to put it in perspective. At least no one asked me for a white shirt with white stripes (

Monday, December 17, 2007

I am why my dad has no hair.

I was a horribly confusing child. Wicked smart with attention span of a fruit fly and the memory of a gnat. We were discussing Christmas's when I was little the other day and my father reminded me of the horrible 6 through 8 years. 6 was the year I realized elves made the toys. This had a bit of fall out, 1. I could ask for really expensive stuff cuz elves made it and 2. it made me question why santa gave me stuff with PACKAGING?! Elves make offical packaging? It didn't seem very plausible. I spent most of Christmas #6 starting at the toy Santa brought me contemplating the packaging. I didn't want to open the toy because I was trying to figure the whole thing out. I didn't actually voice this thought aloud until a few months later when I finally removed it from it's box.
Year 7 santa brought me a toy with NO PACKAGING now you would think that this would make sence to crazy smart/suspicious 7 year old me. Alas it was the 80's and my reaction was (literally) Santa makes cheap knockoff counterfit toys!!!!! Again the parents are really at a lost. Year 8 was a bit funny. Santa brought me books and a fairly generic tradtional sled. He's been bringing me books and dvds ever since. I wonder if I should report him for copyright fraud?

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Not to be all Bash-y but I have Some Complaints about Canada Post

I think for the most part Canada Post does a really good job. They have a lot of packages and letters mailed everyday. The mind wobbles. But in light of my last serious "issue" with them I've discovered that really postal systems are the same all over the world. I have come across a rather glaring omittion in thier service. They don't inform us if they "dispose" of our packages. Case in point, my monkey sock package I sent to Singapore. I included some really swank organic tea. It came in a tin tube. Canada Post in it's infinite wisdom x-rayed my package and decided it was a pipebomb. Yes boys and girls, a freaking pipebomb. So you know what they did? The detonated it. Blew it up and poured fire retardant stuff all over it. We will not discuss the decission making process of "I think it's an expolosive lets's blow it up before it...explodes.." I'ed like you all just to sit back and think of the poor little socks that went poof. The first pair of socks where I really "got" the kitchner stitch. Sigh.

Ultimately I can see (if I freaking squint real hard) thier point. It was pipe looking and had string and stuff inside. I could have been a bomb ... if you squint real hard and don't use any of the fancy equiptment you have been charging taxpayers for since 9/11. My real problem with the whole thing was I didn't know what had happened until I got a wtf? message from the swap matron/mom/leader/insert title of choice. Canada Post gives tracking on all packages for free (yeay) and I knew I was in trouble when the operator went to get a supervisor (it ranks right up there with upholstry and dentist) and she very apologetically told me my package was all poof. Now my point, and for once I have one, is that my freaking return address was on the package. If you deside to explode something shouldn't there be some kind of Hallmark card automatically shipped out??!?!? A form letter?!?! Something??!?! Tell you what Posties I'll write it out for you all you have to do is cut and paste ok?

"We're very sorry to inform you that as we aren't British we can't recognize tea when we see it. Seeing a tin of tea made us think there was a small bomb in the package, suspecting that you maybe shipping expolsives to another country we did nothing to contact you nor, [apparently] turn your name over to the police. Confering amongst ourselves we got a hold of some C4 and made it to a really big bomb then blew it up, it was a really cool expolsion our team was making bomb explosion noises all day. As a bonus to you we think some of the handmade socks you sent to Singapore got there express instead of regular post like you paid for, you cheapskate."

There. Do I have to do everything around here?

Saturday, December 01, 2007

Life Happens...

...and I suppose that's better then the alternative, really. It's been pretty crazy.Dad is ok but not great. He had a birthday this week which he hearted his presents. I do presents good. I have abandoned all hope of doing any Christmas knitting. It's been ok but, I dunno, odd. We aren't busy there is almost nothing to do but I can't keep up and I don't know why. Probably because of the insane people. Which I will get to later suffice to say the city was the proud host of the Full Fronal Lobodomy Survivor Convention.

This post isn't going to be about anything but a much belated Thanks to my SP11 Anna from Who really thoughtful and patient. She sent me an amazing last package. For the record Anna is the genius behind the Mystic Waters KAL. I have always had the greatest pals. Am so lucky.

The Hatcho is really bright and I love it. It's tightly wound which means it'll match me in another week or so ;> The Manos Del Uruguay is going to match my mom's coat. (What's the tack factor on making gifts from gift yarn? Yeay? Nay? There were darning needles and a tape measure (see she knows me so well) And a Pooh Little Instruction book, which should give me a little zen through the holidays (I need a little zen ... I was going to say "now and then" but I can't rhyme without feeling at least a bit apologetic). So much thanks and go and give Anna her props!! She rules!

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Catch up

It's already time to play catch up and it's no where near Christmas yet. This is very un-bodeful. It's been a bit of a car wreck of a week. I Got a lovely little present from Kev, my sp11 in the form of a glttery halloween card and a needle guage, which actually came in handy the day after I got it (go Kev!) I still haven't gotten the camera and the pc to talk to each other **mutter, bitch, whine, curse** I still have to finish mom's Biday sweater sleeve (I had lost the last ball of yarn but found another at the store so yeay) and YB's present is late but should be done soon. I stayed up until stupid o'clock finishing another present but that person was too sick to come to the party... I can't win.

All the packages I am expecting are arriving ate or delayed. Friday I think I found out why. I came home form work near 7pm and the postal carrier was delivering the mail to our boxes....I go in get the mail key talk to my parents and go get the mail. The guy was drunk and still drinking while in the van!!! If I hadn't been in shock I'ed have called the cops but I was really just stunned. Tuesday (Mondy is a holiday I think for the post office) I'm going to be reporting him. It was just amazing, he was driving erratically and had the inflated drunk ego (dude don't do the "I can see you checking me out" head bob when you are drunk and sitting in a postal's aint like it's a Porshe... or like you aren't a complete idiot...)

Also my throat hurts and I am pouting.

More Christmas Knitting to follow....

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloween

It was a pretty eventful Halloween this year. I decorated my store window and won 3rd place ($50 bucks) so that was amazing. I got a picture of it on my camera phone (oh got a blackberry style phone this week) and I haven't figured out how to get it off of it yet. I spent a lot of my day off at work fixing up the store. :( I was dressed up as Tonks this year and I apparently look very awesome with pink hair. In fact, I have to say it suits me better than my natural colour. It was a rather fun discovery. I took my glasses off for most of the day if I ever was able to have bangs I'ed totally switch to contacts, but as I have naturally curly hair, uuuh no. But yes it was cool. Again Pictures forthcomming.

I also had a "Crookshanks" with me, in the form of my cat OHbz. Ohbz loves to duck outside when you aren't watching careful enough but today..oh no..wailing shaking and carrying on. "Heart of a lion that one" Spoo also not with the outside thing. We had 8 kids come to the house. 8. I don't know why I bother at all really. I sat outside as the cats and dogs don't need to be any more disturbed then they already are. But no kids.

I wanted Halloween fun! So I went reverse trick or treating. Which I sware I may do every darned year. I went door to door on my little part of the street giving out candy to the people in the houses. It was so much fun! I'm 30, I don't trick or treat anymore (ok I don't look 30 and the stitches on my chin were taken out and I look like I have a huge pimple but still, I'm too old to go door to door for candy. I'ed kick my ass) So it became the Great Treat Exchange of 2007.
"Here is some chocolate"
"Ok Thanks, have some chips"
It was soo funny how many people just laughed thier heads off. It made it all so very much more fun. Next year I think I am going to arrange grown-up trick or treat and the kids can stay home and hand out the candy as they aren't going out anyways. I know the mall gets 5000 kids, and most stores only have about 1000 treats max., but really...why aren't they trick or treating anymore?

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Friday, October 19, 2007

Humour Where for art thou...?

Still haven't regained the sence of humour. No Idea where it went. I even checked under the couch cushions as that is where everything dissappears to. My sofa is the black hole of Calcutta. I once lost an entire cat between those bad boys.

I now have a giant tv. I was watching a movie today and I really like the big picture. It was odd tho, halfway through the film I stopped thinking about how huge my tv is. (The first few days I just giggled and said "big" a lot). I am wondering how big my tv would have to be before I stopped taking the big for granted. Apparently bigger than my fireplace!

Mom's b-day sweater didn't get done in time. I have a few stitches on my arm and chin, while the chin ones are itchy and are covered in Hello Kitty band-aids at all times. The arm is really sore (also covered with hello kitty or sponge bob, which glow in the dark). I thought it was infected but it's a combination of my being allergic to bandaids (the plastic kids ones are usually ok, if i use an adult cloth one I think I'ed just prefer to bleed to death) and also the fact I have been using my arm and building a ginormous tv stand. So knitting has stalled and stopped. It just sorta hurts. But mom is ok with it, as long as I stop making her look at the stitches ;>. By the end of the week I hope to have mastered washing the hair in the bathtub with one hand, so far it's me getting soap in my eyes and yelling a lot. I'ed offer to take a video as I am sure it's hysterical but I'm not that friendly. Last time I even managed to pull the shower curtain rod with the curtain down on myself. I am charting out a new design for dad's headmaster blanket to act as a needlework pattch. The new design has me knitting the Hogwarts crest onto a blanket. I hope it works out well. For hsi birthday I hope to crank out some socks. I am planning to stitch an "R" and a "L" on each toe as his left sock will be bigger due to swelling.

I am planning a day trip to Calgary with YB in November. Disney Store and Yarn. Perfect for Christmas. ;> Much Disney Store love! More Yarn love! Maybe some Swiss Chalet love...oh please let there be Swiss Chalet love!! Mongolian Grill Love with Cinnabuns and ...I am going to need a few days up there after all just to eat all the food....

Friday, October 12, 2007

For Y/B


Thursday, October 11, 2007

Inspiration, not so much

I am sitting here and thinking about what I want to blog about. I have a lot of things I want to tell people but I lack any inspiration in making it amusing or even entertaining. I'm trying here but it's pretty rough. Things are going ok. There are some good things, some bad and some both:

  • I have some yarn money for the first time in weeks (yeay) this is money for yarn not earmarked for swaps.
  • I taught 2 people at work how to knit and since the 3rd already knew, I am pretty damn happy. One is definitly a Knitter. She is getting a bit obsessive. Yeay!!
  • My Christmas knitting is behind but It's becomming less behind, which is a bonus. Birthday knitting is going well except for a blanket I want to knit.
  • I am crocheting more and with a degree of confidence I never have previous-while this isn't saying much it's saying a lot at the same time. I may crochet the blanket for dad's birthday. Knitting a whole blanket doesn't sound like any fun at all. Crochet will at least be challenging, even if it's basic single crochet ;>
  • I got to spend 3 whole days/night doing things other than being hiome. This is both good and bad. Played a table top game called Arkham horror, much love. It makes me want to read a little HP Lovecraft.
  • Work isn't crazy busy yet, which again both good and bad, I am getting concerned about how not busy it is. I know it's dead when I have time to worry about how dead it is.
  • I have thrown out my hip and am now gimping along BUT that gives me an excuse not to go out on my days off so it looks like 4 days of pj 's and knitting starting sunday (football!) but I have a dr appt on monday and I have a 52" tv and hdtv satellite being installed, bit happy about that too. Now I just need to get a few knitting shows on the tivo!

I would blog stuff but my knitting mojo has slowly been replaced with crochet lust and swatches ain't that interesting OR they are gifts, and I have it on authority people do peek at my blog. Still I shall post again soon and hopefully have a sense of humour or whatever my own brand of manic meyhem can be called.

Monday, October 01, 2007

Secreyt Pal Package !!!

My Secret Pal, whom I call Kev, Sent this amazing package last week. It has this toasty warm autumnal coloured yarn. She was thinking possibly scarf/hat and even included her personal scarf recipie but people: it do be getting cold out, and me, I need MITTENS. But here is y\the twist I want to put a ipod pocket inside the mittens. I have less than no idea how I am going to DO that...but it's what I need as the cold weather will my little pink tunemaker (which also plays videos, and the pink was a breast cancer special item ;>)DIE. With 2 balls there will be enough for a matching hat, Perhaps Foliage??

The needles are a really amazing frosted pink colour and they are the recommended size for the yarn. It was this whole fall knitting kit theme which was cool. There is a Tape measure (which is residing with my sweater in progress (if anyone wants to send me a present a box of tape measures would do nicely...they migrate and get chewed, the cats leave my yarn alone but the tape measures and circs...they get played with and on one memorable occasion yanked out of sock in progress)There is also a really amazing pair of scissor. They are little and wicked sharp. I used it to trim the ends of the sweater in progress and it was like butter. I sware I was looking for more ends to trim. It was so wicked cool. From my what, 2 weeks as a seamstress (a poor one no less)I developed an appreciation for sharp scissors these are amazing. They are made by craft medley and are called a cut above. Go buy some, seriously.
Thanks Kev It was a real treat getting this, I love it!!
EDIT: OMG it's my cervical cancer of the molar colours!!! I just realized that looking back!! Extra yarn love (yes I may have hugged it a little, shuddup)

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Is this on?

Hi-Ho Jinxsa de Knitter here! (Dad bought season 2 Muppet show a few weeks ago send all hate mail about occasionally muppetry to him, oktksbai)

Well it's been a fun week here. I have had nothing but problems with the computer that started off mildly annoying, (hey why does explorer shut down when I go into anything related to blogger?) to extreme wtf?!? (why is my pc doing nothing but reboot after reboot. YB called me Friday to find out why he could hear me cursing from the other side of the city... my isp has renamed me the evil bitch godess of death with HP building me a lovely little shrine with the same monkier. In my defence HP sent me to 6 different operators ncluding a memerable moment with someone who didn't speak any english in some scandanavian sounding place... I think he was in the kitchen, cuz there was banging. I was really hoping they would pull a Cancer Clinic and send me to the office of the present of the company cuz by then I had a lot to say. But long story not so short I got it working enough to make 2 restore disks and I have now managed to do a full restore. I was terrified of doing it cuz last time the pc ended up a doorstop ;/ but it succeded. Working with HP and my ISP we figured out it was the antivirus I pay my ISP monthly for that turned my pc into the darkest corner of technology. My doom had nothing on this. The bright spot was the fact one of the isp guys said b0rked. Then after my phone died after an hour and a half with this guy I tried to get him again, dude you don't know me I want to talk to the guy I know, but alas it wasn't meant to be and I had to deal with new guy. When saying that I had nothing against him I let slip it was mainly cuz the guy had said b0rked that I was so attached. He then thought I was, like, going to tell or something. (CUE 8 YEAR OLD VOICE THERE) New guy then trys to tell be b0rked was really a technical term (oh maybe the swedish chef is working for HP then!!!). But alas 4 scary days later where i could only google, some yahoo and ravelry (thank god!!) oh and hearts, which meh, I'm more a freecell kinda girl, I have a working computer which looks like ass. And I have lost a ton of links, backgrounds, icons, ect. Also it looks like ass. IT BEARS REPEATING OK. Tomorrow I'll reinstallthe camera speaking softwear and I can show you the pretty gear my sp sent me and I got last Sunday (Why does my postal people deliver packages on Sunday?)Yeah I'ed smack me.

Anyways ::waves:: here I are!!

Thursday, September 13, 2007

In place of doing my real job...

It's been a bad day at work. I don't want to really deal with it anymore. And from the looks of it I won't have to. I want to just sit and knit tonight. Actually I want to sit and knit and watch football but the NFL is being less than obliging, don't they know I've had a hard day? I want hard knitting. I want to really just take this hard scary knitting and beat it down. I can so this. Of course I have no really hard knitting. Well I thought it was hard...then I started it's significantly less hard. Drat.

For Example: Dark Mark Illusion Scarf

Once, omg how on earth do you keep track of all these rowns now, satisfying but a little *yawn*

Next Up: Semi-Complicated Floral Basket Shawl

Very complicated to start (well I had to start it about 3 times) now I wonder whats the big deal? Well I wonder about the big deal while worrying it's still going to look like ichiban after blocking actually.

Wisp is garter stitch and 1 row lace repeat.

I have other knits on the go (Christmas knitting shhhh) but all really plain stuff. I want to do an entrelac blanket for my dad but can't find a pattern that doesn't start off with triangles. :/ And I suppose I can always start this for my mom

But honestly I think I may just finish sketching to make my own version of this. The swatch yarn is not working but my old standby should work.

Oh and just to show you how much else I hae laying around on the needles here's a shot of my Lelah top.

Friday, September 07, 2007

SP 11 Contest #2

Am being a very bad blogger but waiting to hear some good news..or not... There has been stealthy knitting but sadly the weather isn't co-operating and all my photos look GREEN. Which I'ed like but the items are orange and a marled pink and brown mix... so no.

So to save the day here comes the SP 11 contest!!

1. What is the one knitting accessory you could not live without?

  • a darning needle, I usually go and buy in bulk because I am forever losing them.

2. If you're heading on vacation, do you take knitting with you? If so, how much and what type of project?

  • Many projects, a sock a sweater a skirt. I think I packed 3 projects for a day trip to Calgary.
3. Where have you travelled to that you'd consider your favorite spot?
  • I don't know about favourite, probably any place in public where people ask me questions about my knitting. But I get the most done in the backroom at work on breaks.

4. What is your favorite knitting book at the moment? Do you own it?

  • I don't have a favourite per se. I am currently lusting after Romantic Knits and the Barbara Walker Treasuries. Oh and Handknit Holidays as if the happy news comes in I shall be broke for Christmas. ;>

5. Do you listen to podcasts? Which is your favorite(s)?

  • My favourite listening matieral while knitting is soaps like Dallas, and Dark Shadows. Oddly enough audio books and podcasts are too distracting.

6. If you could only knit with 1 color for the rest of your life, what color would that be?

  • I'ed die.

7. If you were far into a project and then noticed a mistake near the beginning what would you do?

  • I wouldn't care much unless it was something really bad. If it was and not fixable with an hours or 2's work I'ed frog the project and start something new. I'ed probably be bored starting the pattern over.

8. Where is the most unsual spot you've ever knit?

  • job interview, not for a knitting store. Of course I didn't really want the job after I talked to the interviewer, but I did get a call back....either that or waiting after going through airport security for my friend to get through with my heavy 1.75mm addi turbo dpns. **SNORK**

Monday, August 27, 2007

Haven't I been here before?

So I went to the dentist the other day. I hate going to the dentist. No one likes it, everyone dreads it. Me I contemplate walking in front of cars on the way there to get out of it. Been hit by 8 cars in my life, what's one more? The only thing that would be worse than going to the dentist, is going to the dentist and everyone is in a bunny costume. And I've had that nightmare about 9 times in the past 2 weeks...Seriously.

What is the worst thing that can happen right, pain and money that could have been spent on yarn hemrraging out of my wallet. You get over pain and sadly the money would be spent anyways. Everyone (or damn near) said, what's the worst that will happen? It won't kill you. One astute observer said, hey at least he lets you knit. (He didn't but this time I had big shiny metal needles not cute baby plastic I'll forgive him this time). It wasn't pleasent. There was a great deal of notes and x-rays. Then an exam and more x-rays. And more x-rays, and more x-rays. 16 X-rays of one back molar. And to compound my misery it was the pinch X-ray slide. Yeah THAT one... So final the x was aptly rayed and I was asked to wait for him in his office. Let me explain something to you about dentists, at no time do you want to warrent uppulstry... it's not a good sign. So we go into the expensive part, my rootcanal need finishing and it's infected, the crown needs doing, I need another rootcanal and a few fillings. So basically this is going to cost me a bundle... and a half... AND THEN he asks me about the whole cancer thing. When did I have surgury, chemo, pills blah, basically last surgury was Feb 14 waited 2 months and was given the all clear on the cervical cancer thing, yeay. So now I am freezing my ass off in this office with walls and real furniture, feeling socially awkward discussing my crotch with a guy who specializes in teeth. I am getting a little worried about how he's planning to go about fixing this root canal thing. Turns out I have cysts under my wisdom teeth... about then I start fantasizing about attacking this really nice guy with his own stapler. He's sending the x-rays to a specialist as I may have to have a biopsy, on my freaking molars.

I'm pretty upbeat and positive. I mean in a certain way it's pretty damn funny. Only I could go to the dentist and find out I may have cervical cancer of the molar. Do they even have wrist bands for cervical/molar cancer? If not can I pick the colour?? More than slightly depressed tho to find in less than 6 months I am right back to where I started only with a huge dental bill in front of me. My biopsy better be scheduled when I can do some Christmas shopping!!

I pick peachy verigated with stong yellowy orange... **pout**

Sunday, August 26, 2007

No Sheep Swap, Joy or something with apt punctuation to make this sound happy.

I hates punctuation. It makes me sound silly. ;/ I can do that on my own, I don't need no stinking dots. Why yes, I am in a mood, no, not a particularily good one. I'll blog about it another time. Right Now I want to give huge and OMG so belated mad props (YB you have permission to smack me if I ever say that in R/L) to my downstream pal Chrissie from the No Sheep Swap. She sent me a package in July and I thought I blogged it but it's not there. So I suck. Huge. Not in a nice dinner and a movie kinda way either. In a "You call yourself a Canadian you loser" kinda way actually. I want to take the time, forsaking my am caffine out of self-induced penence, to tell you how cool the yarns she got me are.

The first off it this feaky (I love freaky) little novelty yarn. It's frizzy and bright and mutli- coloured...and wound before I got my swift... but so amazingly awesomely ME. I think there is about 120-150 yards... I am desperately hoping enough to crochet a scarf out of. I don't know why It just needs to be crocheted (how do you past tence crochet as a verb...? that just doesn't look right). I'll show you the scarf I am thinking of and you can tell me I'm mental at the end of the post.

Next I got Thursday these two luxe cones of laceweight yarn. 70% silk and 30% linen. Really tiny thready cobweb stuff the cream and more like traditional laceweight for the blue white cone. These were bought in Tokyo. Dudes! There was an enclosed pattern by cat bohrdi (I don't like capitalizing her name, she has this kinda e.e. cumming vibe doesn't she?) for a lavender eyepillow ( If I hold the yarns together and double it up there should be enough to make it, according to Chrissie.

She also sent me some really nice sparkly styling stitch markers. I am totally trying to figure out how to make stitch marker jewllery I have tried 2 methods but not too happy with them, I will make it work! But really these are pretty and totally wearable I think. Maybe Stitch marker earrings..? And couple bags of imported Green tea. Sweet! Tres Cool.

Much Thanks to Chrissie!! I really loved the gifts you sent me!! I am sorry about the mess up in July!! I le suck!

Oh the scarf I want to crochet : the link is busted. Will edit when not crazy late for work.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

For Michelle, Cuz She Whines! *hee*

Baby's got a brand new knitting bag!!

Your Jealous! Admit it!!

The candleflame shawl, triangle thing. Basically knitting it until I have run out of yarn. I got this yarn online and the colours looked way different on screen then in the skein, but as I wound it I liked it better, but it's much to stiff for socks I think. It's spuerwash so I don't know how well blocking is going to work on it. I love the pattern from the front but....

I can't say I like the nipple-ly back. Oddly enough my boss likes the back better saying it looks like raspberries.

The very evil bellatrix. Cast on 3 times this is the sock that has the most progress. I am going to have to modify the pattern for much fewer stitches to have it fit my calves. I wanted to use my sock blockers but they weren't big enough. These fit like the old 80's slouchy socks...
My leg really isn't that lumpy :/

Josephine or Starsky. Apparently starsky. I am a little concered that it's not going to be as long as I'ed like but it's about 16" so far and as I am 5'2" (and in denial) mathmatically it should work out....cuz yeah math and me are good friends.. Back has about a dozen more rows I think.

Jellyfish Shrug. Well it lives up to it's name!!Trying to potograph this rather limp piece of knitting was a chore the colours are better represented in the pic I snagged of the skein. It's very thin across the back but I am thinking a seed stitch border in the Crimson and Clover then switching to the heavier worsted weight should give some extra width, plus I love the yarn!

Happy Now, Michelle? ;>

Monday, August 20, 2007

Ravelry: The Surgeon General's Warning

Ravelry is contaminated people!! Beware! caution! Danger Will Robinson!! You sign up and get smacked down with most deadly strain of viral startitis the world has ever know. It's not a knitting website it's a drug resitant plauge. Want proof? I had about 3 things actively on the go. Nothing too scary. Since then it's grown. Balloned. Mushroomed.

Now I have always started and abandoned projects as I see fit. It's my hobby no one is holding a gun to my head. I have enough stress in my life that adding worry about finishing a project I am bored with seems more than a little silly. I have terms like current rotation. Sometimes when something just will not work out I like to frog and deny any attempt. I admit this, now, but be prepared for a full denial later.

Check out the progress bars (dude I have progress bars, next stop cuts, I will not be HTML's bitch much longer ok i probably will be but a chick can dream). These are just current rotation. The top layer of things on needles. The whole subsection of things on needles would need another page. I have forgotten most of them. (Except that Malbrigio hat. I really have to find my Boye set. It was a really cute hat, just needs much bigger needles. The MJ hat from Spiderman 2). Current Rotation is not even a complete list. There are presents. We will not discuss the presents as people read the blog. *SHHHHH* I can't even post on Ravely as persons are on Ravelry. (YB if you look at my queue I'll personally arrange for an arborial unconsenting fornication-don't think I won't! And there won't be time for lubricant. [I've been watching too many movies lately]) So to be in current rotation they need to be acknowledged, occasionally touched (sometimes this simply means moving it from the coffee table to the kitchen table to the desk) and sometimes actually knit. And I wonder why I almost never finish anything!?!

Since startng on Ravelry I have started everything that is in current rotaion. And i have about 47+ queue. Some of which I'll never make but at least I know I can find them again if only to think about making them. Dental bills this year are going to be stupid high and so it's the year of the knitted gift. many knitted gifts. I made a few already. Like a knithulu, which I already gave away. Knitted Christmas Gifts are tricky.

I'ed like to design a few basic and simple pattern socks and hats probably. I have Vouge Stitchonary 1 and 2 and 365 knit patterns a day but until the day I die (or suck it up and buy them for myself) I will kick my own ass for not buying Barbara Walker's Knitting Treasurys when I saw the whole 4 volume set for 160 bucks!

Keep an eye on the status bars for more Ravelry inspred startitis.

(to my SP11: I have no idea why I never got your emails. I have been checking my bulk/spam folder and most of it was about enlarging my p3nis or graas that grows anywhere :/ Next time you comment please leave the annonymous email and I can put your email in my address book and, I think, it should stop the problem. Dude I know that quote. I can't think of from where tho. *makes face* It's going to make me nuts (nuttier). I like all sorts of things my favourite thingss rarely have rhyme or reason. It's an Orange thing. There is always something that grabs my attention. Really like current rotaion in knitting, I have current rotation in interests. Right now on the top of the list are comic book heroes, zombies, my Nintendo wii, NFL football (go colts) and Harry Potter. In knitting it's gift ideas. I have one skein wonders and a bunch of random knitting books but little projects are a good thing right now with the whole knitted Christmas thing pending) I'm so-so on socks, my sock mojo left, I'm hoping to fill the void with latvian mitten mojo.)

You know one day I am going to have to do an audio post just because I type scary. Once you hear me talk it's ok but I must admit I do type hella scary.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Secret Pal 11 Questionaire

1. What is/are your favorite yarn/s to knit with? What fibers do you absolutely *not* like?

  • Non-squeecky yarn. Squeeking yarn makes me shudder.
  • I really need some DK and worsted and Possibly bulky to add to the stash. Right now I have a lot of fingering weight.

2. What do you use to store your needles/hooks in?
  • I have a rocken DPN holder from my monkey pal Leslie.
  • I have a vase that holds my straights and um. well the cirulars are either MIA or in projects at the moment.

3. How long have you been knitting & how did you learn? Would you consider your skill level to be beginner, intermediate or advanced?
  • I am an adventurous intermediate (i think in order to be an expert you actually have to be good at knitting. I am averageish.

4. Do you have an Amazon or other online wish list?

5. What's your favorite scent?
  • apples, roses, cinnamon, tea
6. Do you have a sweet tooth? Favorite candy?
  • caramels!! but my teeth are so bad right now I shouldn't, but soo good
7. What other crafts or Do-It-Yourself things do you like to do? Do you spin?
  • I have tried crochet, cross stitch, beading, wire jewllery, floral arranging, scrapbooking and spinning (sort of) I realize am not even a little crafty
8. What kind of music do you like? Can your computer/stereo play MP3s? (if your buddy wants to make you a CD)
  • almost everything I have plays mp3s I like new age/techno opera best
9. What's your favorite color(s)? Any colors you just can't stand?
  • I like yarns in bright colours. I prefer something not royal blue, red nor yellow. If it's to be actual clothing often I will make it out of a more sedate colour. Like a shrug in browns. Scarves gloves or other accessories are bright and wild.

10. What is your family situation? Do you have any pets?
  • I take care of my parents
  • I have 4 cats and 2 dogs
11. Do you wear scarves, hats, mittens or ponchos?
  • not ponchos but I may wear a capelet. ;/
12. What is/are your favorite item/s to knit?
  • right now I am knitting small little gifty things and HP themed items. Fingerless gloves, small bags, hats and a knittend Cuthulu doll
13. What are you knitting right now?
  • fishnet stockings
  • stuffed dragon
  • little pyramid bags
  • owls
  • Jellyfish from Magknits
  • Coachella from Knitty
  • oh and Stasky from Knitty
14. Do you like to receive handmade gifts?
  • UN HUH!
15. Do you prefer straight or circular needles? Bamboo, aluminum, plastic?
  • I like straights but I love my glass circs so I think I just like glass best. Metla Needles are good as I usually warp my wooden ones.

16. Do you own a yarn winder and/or swift?
  • yes I just got this awesome Orange swift for my birthday!!
17. How old is your oldest UFO?
  • lets just say I have many UFO's and I don't care. I knit for fun and if the project isn't fun I usually won't keep going.
18. What is your favorite holiday?
  • Halloween and Christmas (I love Christmas Music!!)
19. Is there anything that you collect?
  • Stuffed Polar Bears
20. Any books, yarns, needles or patterns out there you are dying to get your hands on? What knitting magazine subscriptions do you have?
  • I really want Barbara Wlaker's knitting treasuries!
  • I buy Knit.1, Interweave, Vouge, Simply Knitting and anything else I come across that i like. Not a fan of Creative Knitting though.
21. Are there any new techniques you'd like to learn?
  • I'ed like to be better at fair isle and intarsia
22. Are you a sock knitter? What are your foot measurements?
  • I am tho I am on a bit of a sock break at the moment.
  • My feet are 9" long and 9" instep....
23. When is your birthday?
  • Aug 10
24. Are you on Ravelry? If so, what's your ID?
  • Jinxsa
  • I moderate World War Z (a zombie group) and Yarn In Tights (for comic book fans)

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Sock Kit 2 Swap


How would you rate yourself as a knitter on a scale from 1 (what's knitting?) to 10 (I knit lace in my sleep.)? 7 An adventurous Knitter who can't do intarsia well nor happily

What techniques are you comfortable with? (cables, lace, entrelac, intarsia, fair isle...)What techniques are you itching to learn? everything but intasrisa and fair ilse, i can do them but again, neither well nor happily

What techniques are scarier than grasshoppers monsters in the closet? it's knitting, whats there to be scared about?

KNITTING SOCKS:How many socks have you knit? Guesstimation is okey dokey! 10ish

Do you live and breathe socks, or is this your first time knitting them? Interpolation is encouraged. I like socks but sometimes you need a sweater...or dragon..or something, anything, else

How do you do it: Magic loop, DPNs, two circulars? Bamboo, metal, pencils? 2 circs is my new fave but dpns were my first ;> Magic loop feels like wrestling an octopus

Ever tried any other method? Want to? Willing to try anything...which says a lot about me actually

YARN:What yarn do you currently have in stock? Sweet Sheep, STR, Koigu, Yarntini, Seacoast, C*eye*ber Fiber, Zen Yarn Garden, Louet, Cherry Tree Hill, Kroy, and a few misc around somewhere.

Yarns that you love? Hate? I like my yarn to be like me, tightly wound ;> I like my fingering yarn closer to sport than fingering,

Solid, self striping, self patterning, variegated, hand dyed. Discuss. I prefer verigated but it's always depending on the pattern. Jaywalkers for example look amazing with self striping. Has anyone found something that looks good with jaquardi?

Colours you love?Colours you hate? Bright colours with heavy emphasis on orange, teal, lime and purples. I am not a fan of primary colours.

Are you a wool knitter, or does cotton get you going? (Or, you know, other fibers...) Wool and other fibers, cotton is ok to but a blend is more comfirtable to work with.

Does 100g do you, or do you have a love of tall socks/big feet? I don't have big feet but I heart a long sock.

Do you make your own yarn? Have you ever wanted to try to? I have to get onto the whole drop spindle thing I have a kit it's just sitting down and learning it. I want a spinning wheel but it's not a good investment right now as I wouldn't get enough time to use it

Do you want to use handmade yarn? You know that stuff not spun by a machine... I prefer superwash for socks because I am terrified they will felt!

EXTRAS:Describe yourself in 5 words or less. Funky, Strange, Enthusiastic, Refreshing and Blunt

Have you ever actually used a stitch marker? Periodically, sometimes even in my knitting, there is always a use for a good stitch marker!

You love chocolate, right? I love caramel and toffee best but chocolate rocks too.

Are you allergic to anything I might think about sending to you? (We at Sock Kit Swap 2 do not encourage sending prescription medication to your pals.) Bees ( I understand this means I can't use anything with paba in it skin creams and the like), fish, most detergents and soaps like Ivory(wool wash seems to be ok)

Any patterns you've been dying to try? I bought cookie a.'s patterns but haven't given them a try yet.

Any other random information you think your pal may find useful? My blog is full of them. Right now only that I am entirely HTML impared.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Ravelry: The Ultimate Time suck, Kinda

Ravelry could be the best knitterly thing that happened to me or the no so much good thing that happened to me. I love it but I am completely experiencing eyes bigger than stomach situations. I see so many things that I want to add to my queue but I am trying to restrain myself. It's really REALLY hard though. I have to admit thus far my favourite part has been reading the forums. There are groups for darned near everything!

I am spending much of my online time there (at least I have it minimized to the background almost all the time). I have found many little Christmas presents that I want to make for RL friends and as it's July I wonder how crazy I am to be planning for Christmas already...mind you if I want to get anything DONE for Christmas it wouldn't be a bad idea.

Currently I am working on Bellatrix socks, Errol (all Harry Potter, all the time 'round here), and Jellyfish shrug. Well actually I still need to wind the yarn for the shrug. Which I hate doing. And YB is doing penence or remodling his bathroom or some such crap and thus is being wholly selfish in neglecting his winding duties. Bast-tard-es!

next week I will be totally organizing stash and posting it ! Any reason to organize the stash and play with yarn.
Ravelry Name: Jinxsa

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Big post- I owe ya'll!

I got my last package from my SP my Spoiler is Valerie from It took me a while to figure out her blog as she left clues and not a url. I won't discuss why I didn't think of looking at the participants list for a , uh, FEW days. I got some really amazing swag, including 2!! handknits! A Calorimetry (Am I the only one calling it Calamity?) and a really lovely slip stitch scarf, made out of non-itchy ribbon yarn, who knew there was some? It's so funny because I almost bought that book the day before the package came. I desperately wanted it. Especially how nothing is working for me right now.

Valerie has been a really great pal and I am looking forward to keeping up with her! A knitter/zombie flick fan is just to damned delicious (so to speak). I haven't forgoten she won my blog prize! I can pick something out she'll like now!

Currently my knitting mojo has been sorely lacking. Everything I have knit (including for other people-especially for other people, oi!!) I want to enter a handknit into the local fair-type thing we have going on here. The deadline is Sunday. I tried to knit a DK shawl, it was going quickly but looked like boiled ass made out of string, not yarn but like string. Blech. So I was on the knitting! LJ and saw a link to this I am totally making this now. I am using the cone of yarn I picked up in my last major stash surge. The colours are WAY off, it's much more of a deep dark mysterious plum. (my camera hates my new digs.) I started it yesterday at 4ish, So I have hopes I may finish it before the deadline, hey it's a shawl is it not going to fit? Please. Also check the needles...that's right-glass. I bought these for status, but holy poodle poop do I totally completely heart them. The join looks horrible, I looked at it and thought ...yeah But it's amazing. I bought them at the Sweet Sheep. There aren't a lot left. I'm very sad.

I fell down the sKNITces rabbit hole. I couldn't help it. They look yummy (AGAIN WITH THE CAMERA!) The top row is one skein each of Showgirls, plum pudding, clarisse. Under it my Project spectrum yarn for the month, in Golden Ticket (why not Golden Snitch?, not a HP fan, Michelle? hee)

And while I am not a big red fan....I got me some Zombie!! I'm so geeky.

In my personal life I am doing ok, paying off a rather large unexpected bill. Am getting frustrated about it. Ces't la vie, I guess ;/. I had a follow up to my dr.s physical and was asked how I managed to get there the day of my annual as I had practically NO B12 at all. My colesterol and iron and everything else was very very good but no B12 this is what she suspected was casuing my backouts. I have been trying to remember to take my B12 everyday but I am not very good at remembering to take pills, (YB-you can finish that sentence can't you?-dont need to post it though). The bum jab she gave me (did you know they really do jab you in the bum?, I always thought it was a tv/movie thing) has started to wear off and I find if I don't keep up with the pills, I get black spots in front of my eyes-bah. The new job front didn't pan out they couldn't afford me and/or I couldn't afford them. Work is pretty much back to normal so it's not great but at least it's what I am used to.

I moved my PC and some things into a spare room before the worst of the heat kicked up. I built a new computer hutch (ok I IKEA'd it up) and this is the view from my seat. Cat Butt. Usually there is significantly more tail across my screen. Sometimes Sam-Sam gets up there which is much better as he has no tail. (I am not mean he's a Manx, he's born that way). Eventually I am going to finish cleaning this room out and bringing all my yarn in here and/or my books. I am desperately hoping for a little glider rocking chair to show up in my price range. Or a swift. Hee.

My 30th b-day is in a few weeks. It's interesting. I still get people asking me what school I go to. I am hoping to take a quick trip out of town with Yarn Boy. We'll see what we end up doing. (Oh imax Harry Potter with 3D ending??) I have watched almost 4 hours of Dark Shadows this am, it's wonderful to have as backround when knitting, or writing, or anything. I am waiting for a good bootleg of Order of the Pheonix to come out, just to make screen caps out of it. I want to make Hermione's sweater. And Ginny's and Luna's thought it was crochet (I feel so betrayed by that, or offended). I wish there had been some handknits in Transformers!! ;>

Oh and I, um, found a link at Valerie's . You can find out where you are at in the queue over at Ravelry. I was so depressed as I read like 6 posts about how amazing it was this morning, Valerie had 665 people ahead of her. I didn't want to know how many were ahead of me. Well, actually I did.
  • You signed up on May 29, 2007
  • You are #5826 on the list.
  • 8 people are ahead of you in line.
  • 12244 people are behind you in line.
  • 32% of the list has been invited so far

Can I call in sick to work today?

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Socks! I have socks!

I recieved 2 pairs of socks in the mail this past week...(and a half) and I'm just getting around to blogging them. I could point out that I had made an executive decision to do all the laundry that I had left for over since a week before my second to last post, but there is a small load of jeans in the hamper mocking me. Also I am expanding my space in the house. I have covertly taken over dad's old office upstairs. Mom knows dad doesn't. As dad can't get up the stairs I feel my secret is safe. Enter new computer desk (that tried to kill me a few times during assmebly). Yarn will move in there eventually and maybe a tv. There are 2 recliners in here one for me one for laundry and cats. Dispite that we own more hampers per capita (even figuring in the dogs and cats) then anyone else I know we seem to always have a shortage. I can't explain it. It's a mystery for the ages. On to the way cool sockage.

First Up is my Griffandor Harry Potter sock from my pal MJ!! (yeay MJ). I happy to report the socks are cool and comfy. Tres Rocking! ( They came with many treats for my menagery like chocodrops for the dogs, Greenies for the cats and um...catnip. Canip in packages is aparently bad. We don't use catmip at the house so we didn't know this. I came in the house with the package after another hideous long Sunday to find my package in the mailbox. (I get packages on a sunday...weird). I go down stairs to say goodnight to dad and no more than 5 minutes later the package is opened and things are all over the kitchen. Even a week later (or a bit more-dudes I am sooo hideously behind on everything) package items are getting lost/stolen. Not pictured is the treats for the animals and a foot bath balm and tea tree oil for me and my poor abused feet. The socks are hairy because OHBZ took my feet for a ride when I wore them yesterday. I'ed have taken a picture but he's 30 pounds and there was no way I could manage stairs. Oh and that little piece of paper. Opening day tickets for Order of the Pheonix. HEE.

The second package is from Leslie who is my Monkey Sock Swap Pal. Yeay. The yarn she Used for the sock is stuff she handdyed herself (it's so soft and funky). Apparently she was going to use the other funy stuff in the back there but it wasn't working out. Monkey socks don't lend themseves well to self striping OR ...i want to say Jaquardi.. but I am not sure that's the term I am looking for. And there is 4 monkey Items by Bobby Jack. Glitter Tattoos, puffy Stickers a necklance and a keychain. But next to best (I like the socks best from the package tyvm) is the dpn case that matches the socks. I had a case like this once for long straights but everything fell out but this one folds then wraps and dudes, she sewed it up herself!! Am I the only one who after sewing for 3 months only produced 1 purse and one remotely wearable skirt? But seriously the case it really cool!! Yeay! You can find Leslie at and you should tell her how cool she is.

I can't express how much I love both these pairs of socks and how much I feel my own knitting sucks by comparison .... but the thought matters most of all, so thanks for thinking of me.

Do you have this in white?

Well I really outsmarted myself this time.

I work in women's clothing and I had a lady come in asking me if we had any shirts like the one in the window (green and white striped about 1.5 inches thick) Now of course I think she is refering to the solid tank top as she only mentioned one colour and the stripes are on the table in the doorway) and I start off by showing her tank tops. She gets mad at me for not being able to read her mind and she said "The striped one!" Ok I can adjust, never say I'm not flexable. So in attempt to figure out what the poodle-poop she wants I ask white with what colour? She pauses and furrows her brow then says loudly (like I'm speaking a foreign language and hearing impared) "White-with-white-stripes" Thinking this woman is a few apples short of a bushel...maybe more then just a few...and taking note of the vein throbbing in my head I take a solid white shirt off the rack to show her. I'm fully thinking I went to far and I'm going to get yelled at (and rightfully so) when the customer in question looked all sad and said "Oh, don't you have any with the stripes going the other way?"

You ever see 2 sales associates get jammed in the backroom dooor trying to get to the bathroom before they wet their pants?

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Why Yes This Is A Cop Out

Sadly I have a headache the size of Texas, a tooth ache the size of Orogon and the attention span of a gnat today. I haven't posted in forever due to job upheval which when it stops heaving I will fill you all in. I am still writing my Zombie Arrmageddon Post that was for Internation Zombie Blog Day on the 13...**sigh** Put all that together and couple that with my parents' citronella accident (I am majorly allergic so you can picture how happy I am) You get a cop out post of Pictures from the Toronto Zoo during my trip.

Monday, June 11, 2007

I have Not Dropped Off the Face of the Earth, Maybe If I Asked Nice Tho

Hello All, It's been a very long weekend here, well for me. 9-9 Saturday and 9-fraking midnight Sunday. I did not knit in public. In fact I did not knit at all. Oh I had plans but sadly so did head office. I do not like my headoffice today. As 27 hours on my feet at work have made me feel much shorter than I am, at 5'2" I can't afford to lose much! I wonder if I can sue for height minimization? Does Workman's comp cover shortning? Today I shall knit exclusively on my Harry Potter Sock as I am so far behind MJ it's scary. I will also do laundry as I have ziltch to wear to work tomorrow. I may post knitting content today or not. I want to but the effort of finding something not secret may do me in. Much top secret knitting. Need Ultraviolet clearance. (I love Babylon 5-luckily so does my dad so there has been much b5 watching here lately)

Friday, June 01, 2007

Why Self Imposed Deadlines Suck.

Dudes. I had a day off, a whole day off. I got the plague. I know no one with a cold right now. Not one person. I can't recall seeing anyone or serving a customer with a cold since I came back from vaca. So why in the name of all that is stringy do I feel like I am swimming underwater with my snorkle pointing the wrong way? In what way is this at all fair? **mumbles**

I did the draw today sort of. I wasn't really a draw it was more me going pick a number between 1 and 13 to my dad. Who promptly answered 20, 16 and 2347. *Sigh* (this is what comes when you encourage him, Yarn Boy). I then went to my mother, who is adorable but hearing impared and not one to pay to much attention. I asked her to pick a number between 1 and 13 she told me we have no tomato soup and would I like Cream of Mushroom.....for the record I never want Cream of Mushroom, except in a casserole, and not at all in this case. Clearly finding an impartial judge was going to be difficult. So I consulted the manifest of living bodies in the house, meaning, in this case, I triped over a cat. Divine inspiration! I grabed a d20 cuz I am queen of the geek girls rolled it on the floor by the stairs and let the cat knock it off the stairs. 20. Clearly the cat had been talking to my father. Still eventually there would be something between 1 and 13.....eventually was 7(!) times more, let me tell you if any of you had been #18 I'ed owe you my whole stash. But eventually #6 bounced aross the carpet. So yeay Blacklace (My secret pal 10). I'll have a prize ready for you the minute I can breathe through at least one nostril and , you know, find out who you are ;> either/or.

No doubt you are wondering which one got the most votes 9-4 for starsky on the blogger side of things. 2-7 for Josephine on the co-worker and so forth side of things. I really should have seen that one comming, huh?

Friday, May 25, 2007

7 Random Things About Me

I got tagged by MJ to do the 7 random things MEME. I'm not tagging anyone else because either they have done it , they don't want to do it or they don't have a blog.

1. I write the way I talk. I got a rather nasty comment about how I write on the blog. A lot of ..., comma's, quotation marks, to say nothing of perenthesis. If you know me, I think it would make a lot more sense. It's like hearing the cadence of speech but in print (I usually have a lot of little asides when I speak, I like to get off topic (sometimes off the off topic in the same sentence) but I do realize that multiple perenthesis make it difficult for the reader (crap)). Perhaps one day I'll do a blogcast and read my entryaloud. I'ed be more inclined if it weren't for....

2. I sound like a chuipmunk in heat. My voice is fairly high pitched and I tend to get over excited and speak much to quickly. When dealing with customers I have a whole other voice, when dealing with my parents I have yet another (well it's much louder anyways). The chipmunk thing is much worse on the phone, unless I am trying to do something unpleasent (hello internet tech support) then I sound like Angelina Jolie or something.

3. I forget my own phobias. I like to think i can go to a haunted house, for example but I always, ALWAYS, chicken out. I hate snakes and lizards but I go to the zoo and walk past them thinking "Ok, I can deal with this ther is glass between us" then I am shoving children and old people out of my way to get past the snakes. If I see a snake on tv or in a movie I can't have my feet touch the floor, they end up on the seat with me (You can imagine the leg cramps I got when seeing Anaconda-see I always forget my phobias)

4. Everyone around me misinterprets my phobias, well, one of them. I don't like rabbits. I think they are cute and cuddly and sweet lookin. But they have big teeth and claws and can really hurt you if they have half a mind to do so. So I am not afraid of bunnies per se but I have no desire to ever hold one, as it has bigger teeth than brains (also why I stopped going to the bars)

5. I hate being called the c-word. No not that one (tho I wouldn't like to be called THAT ONE either) I mean cute. It's not so bad now but a few years ago everyone called me cute. I was a Hello Kitty in a Jessica Rabbit world. Skirts that ended 5 inchs above the knee with pitch boots were equally as cute as an oversized sweatshirt picturing frolicing kittens. There was a limit and the skirt boot combo was it.

6. My verbage is questionable. I like to make up words and I deliberately mix metaphors. For example, I like to say "thats a different ball of fish" a mix of "a whole new ball of wax" and "a new barrel of fish". I love the word pointy (which is important and/or relevant) and unpointy (unimportant and/or irrelevant) I use the words so much that I forget what words I am trying to replace. Lately I have enojyed saying unpossible it certainly gets noticed. It makes customers pay more attention when you throw odd little languagy bits at them.

7. I love closed captions. I love them so much! My mother has about 15% of her hearing left and she hates them, my father has lost about 20% of his and he hates them (although in all due fairness his last stroke efected him so he has a hard time reading the leftmost part of the line). I have most of my hearing (stupid walkmans/ipods) and I love them. It's probably because I watch so much BBC tv. Accents and lingo can really screw me up somedays.

Dreaming Big

I bought a bit more yarn. And by a bit i mean about 3 large boxes worth. You saw in the last falsh the stash most of the first of 3 boxes, well the other 2 came in and here is the rest complete with thier "Dream Big" pictures. (FYI the contest will keep going until Tueday of next week as that is my next day off, as good a reason as any I suppose). I ended up at Micheals and picked up a lined hamper style basket to help hold my new yarn. I have shelves set up but I need to reorganize them. I plan on taking 3 days off in a few weeks are really just moving furniture and so forth to make more room and to get the computer out of my room before it gets to hot out.

Above is random stash I bought. Some of it is for Secret Swaps but mostly for me. (listed because I like to know so I figure someone else may as well)
  • 2 Louet Euroflax Linen in Violet
  • Sweet Socks in Lola (that's the yellow, blue and purple verigated yarn)
  • 3 Debbie Bliss Cotton Angora In Teal
  • 2 Hip Knits Silk in Swet Sheep colourway (hot pink)
  • 150g Handmaiden Sea Silk Lace in Dragonfly
  • Fleece Artist Sea Wool sock Yarn inPinata
  • 2 balls of Alpaca Silk in hot pink

The Louet Gems is for 3 Pairs of Harry Potter Socks. I have started the ones that need to be mailed (Hi MJ!) and I really really hope the other 2 pairs dont' take too long, it's the first time I have made men's socks and that means they are pretty big right? Drat.

This is Shelridge Farms this and the items above are what I ordered from (Hi Michelle!). You know the place I am forever talking about? Yeah there. She has a ton of new things in already and I want to tell you about them but I am broke and you'll get there before I do so my lips are sealed. Go look and find your own stuff. In the right of the picture is 4 skeins of Shelridge Farms Worsted in "Pink Lemonade" which I either bought for Tempting or the Cable Bandeau from Interweave Knits. I can't remember which. So it probably means I'll cast on either one depending on the weather that day. Warm it'll be the bandeu, cool temperatures would lead to Tempting. To the left is Shelridge Farms DK in "Candy Floss" and "Raspberry", the Candy Floss is from an attempt to make the Dollar and a Half Cardi (which with lace and reverse stockingette makes the wearer look like the staypuff marshmellow man UNLESS the knitter is willing to change the needle size twice per lace and stockigette repeat. I wasn't.) Instead I am thinnking of trying to make this 9also it proves to Interweave I forgive it for the Michlen Man sweater so they wont produce another issue like the current Summer one in it just me or is only ok, not great?)

I'm not sure I like the pattern on the sides of the sleeves so they may be plain The back is kinda freaky too, but interesting and it looks really complex, whgich is better than cool-it's kewl.

This was my fisrt order from knitpicks. The yarn is good for the price and I haven't tried knitting anything with it. As you can see I desided to knit the "Equinox Yoke Pullover" from fall Interweave '06. I saw one in person at the Frolic and it was soo nice. Plus I have bohus envy. As you can see I opted not to do brown. I don't know why. I'll wear this all the time in fall winter where all my bottoms are in the earthtone family it seems but I like bright colour so the pale grey sweater with brightly coloured yoke is very yeay. I am not sure I did the oatmeal colour at the bottom right or the pale violet next to the bag of grey. I have time before I cast on so I'll play about a bit, maybe I should draw a chart with crayons to see the colours I like together (seriously). I went from "Akk! No colourwork allowed!!" to "Oh that looks nice and hard" in the oversized scary sweater that swallowed my house. That was just 2 colours this is ..more. I'ed count but I'M AFRAID.

Also included is the yarn for Josephine or Starsky. This stuff is huge! I know I have been manily working with fingering yarns lately but OMG bulky yearns look huge! I don't know if I can knit something that is like 2 sts. per inch. It'ed fell almost vulgar! Like I was cheating somehow. I can just imagine doing a half dozen rows and having 8" of progress to show. I'ed be giddy!

I also bought 3 circular needles, 2 sets of dpns and a magnetic chart keeper. The needles are amazing and so cheap I think I am going to end up owning a lot of them. Yeay! I like them a bit better than addi because when I knit my stitches are always close to the needle tips so with addis there is a lot of sliding off issues, these not so much, which kicks so much ass. The chart's ok. The magnets are not very magnetic and I'ed put a pouch on the back of the keeper to hold notions or other patterns that aren't in current use. I am going to see if I can get some better magnets and If i can put a pouch on the back, it was ok for the price but it's not on my list to buy more.

It was a magnificent spree and I love my new stash and gear. I have a lot of projects I can make, but the really nice thing about Dream Big is I don't have to follow through on specific I deas. That's the Dream part. I may find something else I want to make and change my mind, and I am ok with that.

NOTE:I have been tagged for 7 random things MEME that everyone in the knitblog world has done (I think) but that will have to wait until next time as the fiber was way, way, way more exciting. Sorry MJ you'll just have to wait. (Also you should know me well enough by now to realize everything about me is random) ~D.

Monday, May 21, 2007

My First Blog Contest

My first blog contest. I am sitting here working on my "Dream Big" file, there is a lot of projects in there. I did a huge bunch of yarn ordering this past week and I bought enough cream bulky yarn for a sweater coat. The problem is I don't know which to knit. So I'm going to have a little contest. It'll run until next week and all you have to do is vote which one I should cast on. I'ed also appreciate if you gave a reason as to why you think I should make one over the other but it isn't necessary. I have a lot of hush hush secret pals out there and they can leave comments annonymously and the prize in question can get sent out after the big reveal. Iwon't announce what the prize is yet because not everyone who reads this is a knitter, most I think are, not to mention when someone who owns her own store reads your blog you need to be inventive with prizes ;> I think I'll give 2 away depending on how many entries-one drawn randomly and 1 based on how thoughtful the answer was (even if it's not endorsing the one that makes the final cut).

Here it is the Battle of the Titans


Current pros and cons
I love the banana leaf panels on Starsky they are the sexy but the cables on Josephine stand out more, and this may come as a shock, I like to stand out in a crowd. Both I'ed have to put in buttonholes but Josephine isn't as open in front, a plus as I always wear tank tops but it's fairly bulky looking. I am not into math so altering either pattern is, while not out of the question, probably going to limit the odds of this project ever getting completed. (I'm being honest here-I am pretty sketchy on knitting math). I like both of these for different reasons but I'll let you pick which one I do. (Well I'll post this at work so my non blogging co-workers get to vote too-if they have to look at it in the backroom for 3 months they should get a say-tho they won't be in the contest.)
Hopefully this idea doesn't fall flat.
Both patterns are available to paruse at

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Flash The Stash

Well the top layer of the stash, after you get past the top layer there's a lot of yarn that I'ed rather forget, you know back from the days you thought it didn't get better than Bernat Satin. Those young, innocent, carefree days before I had actually held silk, angora and cashmere. Before I heard of "Limited Edition" colourways. I have very faint memories of the days before I realized they call it yarn because the name heroin was already taken, the stash remembers tho. The stash has a crystal clear memory of my finding fuzzy acrylic yarn with multi-contrasting-coloured shlubs in it. (OMG $2 a ball, I must have the whole bin!) My stash remembers when I hadn't even thought of ordering yarn online and thus was reduced to Micheals, Walmart and Zellers. My stash remembers when I went throught that bamboo needle frolic at the dollar store-hint when you go in everydayon your lunch because you have to replace one you broke it's no longer cheaper to buy needles at the dollar store. My stash has so much Red Heart and random generic acrylic that it asks fashion advice from guys in bellbottomed flood-pant powder blue tux's.

The top layer of stash is pretty shallow, in more ways than one. It's lured in by the words silk and cashmere. It likes bright colours but only works the neon in offbeat and "kitch" ways. It's grown-up stash. It reads Vouge. It's luxurious. It screams out to be touched. It appreciates quality. It buys brand names. It ... has a sock fetish. Look there's a cone! The stash is learning to commit!

And for those of you who noticed the Bernat Camaflage in pink..remember above all it's MY stash, so it has to have a sense of humour.

EDIT:I have been advised to mention that this is not all of the top layer of stash. It is in fact much bigger however the bedroom I take pictures in (to forever be known as theonly room in the house with any kinda of natural light) isn't mine and If I covered her bed with the entirely of the top layer, well, I'ed have died, probably painfully and it doesn't seem worth it somehow.

Friday, May 18, 2007

Drumroll Please..

Caution Rambling % is high in this entry. Sanity is at risk.

Public Sevice announcement. Please people sending me parcels, can you ship them off later in the day? I don't need people showing up at 7 :15 to deliver packages I am neither dressed nor even remotely "with it". (squinting while repeating the word "what?" 16 times when the postman has yet to say anything makes him a bit...edgy) No postal person deserves that sort of treatment. Twix look like breakfast food at this time of what is laughingly descripted as day. (You want day come talk to me when the AM hours are double digits.)
Thanks, Management ;>

I have been waiting on two packages. One from my Secret Pal 10 and one from my Knitter's Treat Exchange. Sure enough they both arrived the same day, isn't that always the way?? Still I have a lovely box (Huge) from Michelle @the SweetSheep (yeay new yarn, most of which I am not giving away-probably, I took an abandoned SP under my wing, She followed me home, I sware, can I keep her?) So other than the No Sheep Swap and the Monkey Swap and the Not So Secret Harry Potter Socks I'm um... swap free, I can't type that with a straight face, NEVER A GOOD SIGN. Still as long as I can tell mom that it's for all my pen pals, she says little about the string.

What?, Oh you want pictures? OK anything to keep you ravening hoards at bay ! ;) The first up is from my Secret Pal...I can't link to her yet...soon...not yet...but soon....(way to many cartoons this week, I need to cut back before "I tink i tee a puddytat")

When I saw the yarn I thought it said Brillo (you know those S.O.S pads?) I thought "That can't be good,' But it IS. it's a cotton viscose blend, it's soft and stretchy. It'll be socks, I'm into the whole socks thing now. I think it'ed make a nice pair of monkeys or maybe a cabled sock. I haven't done cables in a while. There is a copy of Vouge Knitting on the Go-Weekend Knits Which is perfect for my microscopic attention span (2 tanks in there have my vote) and the Everything Book of Knitting- I love Everything books, I have the one on Philosophy and a few others and they have a tounge in cheek humour that appeals to me. Plus cute cartoons! And 2 sets of note cards, in so pretty colours!

My treater was Dana from . I liked this exchange in someways, other ways not so much. Quote from Exchange rules - Treats you MUST send: 1. Enough yarn for a one skein/small project 2. Magazine 3. Pampering treat - e.g. Hand cream, bath fizzer etc 4. Delicious treat - e.g. chocolate/candy/tea/coffee 5. Your blog address, so your pal can say hello (which in typical Jinxsa style I forgot). I had a hard time with the magazine, who knows who has what? They are so easy to pick up, sitting right there at the checkout, waiting for you. Be nice if they put personal ads there, you could get bread, cheese, soup and a boyfriend all in the 8 items or less lane. Better than chocolate and tabloids-though apparently that OK! with Mel B and Eddie Murphy's baby was the best seller since they started I saw that sucker everywhere in town, geez what an ass.)

Wait where was I? ;/ Oh yeah my Treat Pal!! (Sorry) She sent me some awesome orange trekking I almost bought in Lettuce Knit while visiting Toronto. I drew the line at buying one extra suitcase for yarn. I would have made fun of me for 2 extra suitcases. So it's going to be a really nice...scarf..ha you thought I was going to say socks, I know you were don't lie! A cute bright scarf that will work with all the fall browns! There is a lovely little case that the sweet smelling lotion did NOT want to come out of. I got sheepy notecards (I need to correspond more) and Knitting (published in England) and the new knitscene with the konobi jacket *kewl*. She sent me breast cancer stitch markers in honour of my mom, who is doing great with her new curly hair (that is a mini 'fro but she's still damn cute). There was twix. I know what I am having for supper (shuddup yarn boy your just jealous because I got chocolate through the mail and you didn't) and Nips caramel hard candy!

My downstream pal for the Knitter's treat exchange was Kaki who can be found at . If you want to see the package I sent her it's at So 2 swaps down, a few more to go! This is so cool! I love the internet, sometimes, usually, sorta when it usues it's powers for yarn not evil.

Big Huge EDIT~I can't believe I forgot the most important part~ Thank You Dana and Secret Pal for taking the time and effort to get to know me and put my packages together. To not have said that before was, at best, unforgivable and, at worst, rude. (Why no I don't have that backwards I'm Canadian) I'm so sorry and am willing to grovel appropriately! Thank You very much.